Wait!... but why?

I have made many a bad decisions in life. I would like to believe i am not alone in doing so. For most part I blamed someone or something for it. Now that i am older and a little wiser i know the responsibility lies solely with me or more accurately perhaps always did.

It is surprising how taking responsibility gives a sense of comfort, closure and is a great teacher of humility. Taking responsibility is definitely good but i really wanted to understand why i took and perhaps was taking poor decisions in the first place. Could it have something to do with my birth sign? Mars retrograde? My stars?

Jokes aside could it actually be because of some weird gene? And while i don't have the answer from a DNA point of view i do know that in almost 99.9% of the cases the reason was because of time or should i say the lack thereof. All the decisions that ended up with bad, negative or having unwanted results where taken when i was rushing through, when i did not have a moment to spare, when i was low on sleep and perhaps when i was mentally and physically at low points. The rest of 0.1% was because i wanted to play cool.

As a serial fast talker, over worker and overall hyperactive personality it has taken me some time to slow down. It is surprising how just being slow helps. Slow down and have a read below :)

1. Speaking.

I am not advocating talking at snail's pace. Everyone's time is precious and we should be mindful of that. The more succinctly we are able to put our thoughts and points across the better for both the listener and speaker. Let's face it , people who take 30 minutes to describe their avocado toast brunches all get on our nerves.

I have been able to calm not only myself but fellow friends, family members and clients when some shit has hit the ceiling. And needless to say a calmer decision is a better decision.

2. Breathing

I am not advocating acing David Blaine. All that is required is that we breath well. Letting all of our lungs fill with air. I have been able to avert many a fast but dangerous work fall-outs by hitting pause, taking break and breathing deep & slow. There are many proven studies which tell benefit of breathing well. May i suggest a quick Google search?

3. Walking

I am not a fan of people walking slowly chatting away on the phone in a busy subway blocking a whole crowd behind them. In this please do walk fast or be aside. This is also not a point against brisk walking that some experts say help lose weight. This is more about slowing your pace in an attempt to slow your mind from racing. Many studies point to the many benefits of Earthing - reconnecting our body's electrons to those of mother earth. Again a quick Google search gives insightful results. A good summary can be read here - https://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-9099/the-surprising-health-benefits-of-going-barefoot.html

4. Thinking

Tying it all together and in adding to point 3 is slowing our thinking. Not always or in general but training our minds to make effective decisions. Training our minds to take a pause, stop fixating, cut out the noise, enjoy the moment and give our minds the time to do what it dies best - think. A brilliant book in this regard is by a Nobel (not Noble) prize winner- Thinking , fast and slow.

In retrospect would my life be different if my decisions were better? I don't know. As a believer i do believe i have been in and currently am in right place with the right things and the right people in my life. But better decisions would have certainly given me fewer heartaches, fewer headaches and overall better sleep and we can all do with a whole lotta of latter. Here's to making better decisions ahead and proclaiming with confidence as Eleanor Roosevelt - “I am who I am today because of the choices I made yesterday.”